New still of Chris Pratt in Jurassic World (2015)
i’m a heterosexual man and i’m screaming
Chris Pratt is my new role model in life and fitness
this man needs to be stopped.
so are my
me? a Taylor Swift fan? The girl that was born December 13th,1989 at 8:36 am on a Wednesday, at Brampton Civic Hospital in Wyomissing, Pennsylvania to Andrea and Scott Swift?
i’m not like other girls
i was born with glass bones and paper skin
every morning i break my legs, and every afternoon i break my arms
at night, i lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep
Oh??? apparently I’m a Narcissist?
my brain: there is literaly a 0 percent chance the fictional shit from creepy games will show up irl in your kitchen
me: but its dark and scary
THIS IS LITERALLY SO CUTE
7 billion people, 14 billion buttholes
a slight calculative error was madeanus georg
are you implying there’s a human named anus georg who posesses 7 billion buttholes
that is terrifying
im so PUMPED about fall!!!!! ill wear 500 sweaters i dont care ill shove a whole pumpkin up my ass
what if i died in like twenty years and all i left my girlfriend was a box and like she gasps and reaches down to her chest where her key necklace hangs that i gave her twenty two years ago, and she uses it to unlock the box and all that is in there is a string which you can pull to reveal an embarrassing photo of spongebob at the christmas party